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COMMENTARY: Rosa Parks taught us how to live with dignity, respect

  • Published
  • By Col. Scott McLaughlin
  • 446th Airlift Wing commander
MCCHORD FIELD, Wash. --  On Dec. 1, 1955, in Montgomery, Ala., a tired seamstress, on her way home from work, decided that she could no longer accept the indignity of having to give up her seat on a bus to a man because of the color of her skin. Rosa Parks was arrested because what she did broke the law. She is quoted as saying at the time, "Why do you push us around?" Her arrest sparked action that resulted in a landmark Supreme Court ruling banning segregation on public transportation and a transformation of civil rights in this country. Mrs. Parks knew what would happen that day, but she had reached her limit.

Almost 50 years later, expecting to be treated with respect and dignity, no matter who you are or where you live, may seem like the norm. In the military environment, there are prescribed customs and courtesies. We salute when it's called for, we follow orders, we are expected to be fair and treat everyone according to their rank. For a lot of us, that's how it is. But, for others, it is not.

Living with disrespect alters people negatively. It diminishes the person being disrespectful and the person being disrespected. It stops the initiative, enthusiasm, and teamwork needed to get the mission done. In a military where we need everyone to contribute, we can't afford the loss of even one person's best efforts.

If you are feeling disrespected, a good place to start is with respecting yourself. It's easy to feel lost in a large, busy organization, but what you do is important. You deserve respect. And then act with dignity. That doesn't mean you can't have fun, but when the situation calls for it, represent yourself well.

Respect others and their point of view. We have the privilege of serving with people from all walks of life, from all over the U.S. and other countries. Each person comes with their own belief system and customs. There may be times when you don't believe the same way or the same things, but you can try and understand. It's the best way to find common ground with someone with whom you are having difficulties.

Take the time to build relationships. Join the team. It's much easier to tell someone, of any rank, what you need to feel respected if you know them and they know you.

Be polite. President Theodore Roosevelt said it best. "Politeness is a sign of dignity, not subservience." It doesn't take anything away from you to be polite, even when someone else isn't. In fact, it can go a long way to defuse a negative situation.

Be patient. A disrespectful conversation or incident may have nothing to do with you, but something else that another person is dealing with at home, or at work. If you take the time to find out what the entire situation is about, it will save you time in dealing with it and allow you to deal with it authentically.